Was it real?
Three years on after the beginning of the pandemic and I am still living in what seems to be a surreal nightmare. I seem to have lost three whole years of my life. The worst thing is missing the birth of my second granddaughter and seeing her and her cousin grow into such good pals. New Zealand is a million miles away now. But more than that it’s losing contact with other family members and friends. Zoom and FaceTime is OK, but nothing beats the hugs and cuddles. Even now friends say, ” are you hugging?” which takes away that spontaneous greeting on reconnecting.

If anyone had written the story of the events of the last three years prior to 2020 it would have felt like science fiction. Masks and hand gel and PPE. No access to shops for so long, working from home, children couped up away from school friends. Three metre stickers and warnings to keep apart. The thought of dying, being on a ventilator and segregation from family. Constant testing and free test kits, not to mention online food shopping!

Then limiting access to people who were dying, to funeral services. Video ceremonies to allow people to say farewell. Vaccinations to stop us getting so ill, yet for me after 6 there were no antibodies . My antibodies come from sub cut Ig (subcutaneous Immunoglobulin infusions) and now from having covid in December. Yet hopefully this mass vaccination programme has stopped the majority of deaths and serious illness, together with the advent of antiviral treatments for those at high risk.

Now three years in most people are acting as if the danger of Covid 19 is over. It is definitely not as serious but there are still hundreds of people dying each month across the world. Are the clinically vulnerable people being forgotten? We still have the choice to wear face masks- which are dubious in their effectiveness. We can still choose to live in relative isolation, only meeting up outside or asking visitors to test prior to their visit. There are people who are still doing this and have avoided catching covid. But realistically three years on, several variants and vaccines later, is this a continuing option?

I lived in fear and isolation for three years yet still caught covid. I was lucky, I got Paxlovid, sailed through in seven days and had no symptoms of long covid. I still think twice about going into crowds, won’t fly or take unnecessary risks. Even my consultant intimated I had lost my fear. Not strictly true but I am not as frightened of catching it again. My family and friends no longer recognise me as at risk. But this pandemic has seriously affected my mental health, my confidence and my freedom.

Feel the fear but do it anyway? The choice is yours.